It's the best show you're NOT watching!

True story! But I'll get to that momentarily.

After I wrote my Saturday entry, I immediately got in bed, and Vesko & I started talking about the nannies I had in my youth. Without fail, Vesko says something to me every single day that makes me fall a little more in love with him every day. And, again, today was no different. As if I was not already smitten with him from all he had done for my family that day, while we were discussing some of the more colourful experiences my family had while trying to find the next nanny for me, he asked why I had nannies. I told him my parents worked very, very hard to give me an amazing childhood and to give me EVERYthing I could ever want growing up, so when I was very young, they worked a LOT. My dad worked FOUR jobs at one time so that my mom could start the business she has today. Without that huge sacrifice, we wouldn't have all we have today. But, I'm digressing. I'm a career woman. I love to work, and I love to be in charge. I'm definitely management, and, before I was forced out of work on disability, I was being groomed for management. BUT. There is ONE thing that would change all that. Writing reports, handing out discipline, attending meetings, making business trips, and finishing daily cash summaries would be stopped the SECOND I gave birth until the child was at LEAST first grade. I've never mentioned my desire to be a stay at home mom to Vesko. Well, not a constant stay at home mom, ya know. I just want to be there with them 24/7 while they're stay at home aged. Anyway, we're lying in bed and I'm relaying hilarious shennanigans to him and he says, "Well, our kids aren't going have a nanny. " I asked him why, because the way he said it made it sound like he thought it was something only snooty assholes have. But, he said, "Because you're going to stay home with our kids." Ahh! My heart melted a little more! That's what I've always wanted. That's what I wanted when I was a child. I'm not angry at my mother, of course. I love her more than anything. Her countless hours of hard work have given us the luxury we have and have had for some years now. And I assure you, this did not come easy for her. There's no guarantee that I'll be able to be a stay at home mom when (if) the time comes, but it warms my heart to know that's what we'll be working toward. 

Annnnnd on the subject of baby type things. How about we talk about some OB/GYN things here. This article was linked to me by my best friend, Melissa. I have to say, I am just never surprised by humankind's dedication to stupidity. The following is a paste of the text, but the original page can be found here 

"Way too many male ob/gyn doctors have crossed-the-line, and once a spouse has been violated, you can't take it back, so why take the chance?  If a woman truly loves her SO or husband, then she would 1.) try to be as modest as possible, 2.) be respectful of his feelings, 3.) not expect him to endure such pain and disrespect.  Now, if there were to ever be a "life threating emergency", by all means 1st doctor available then please.

Fortunately, my wife shares the same convictions as I do, and has way to much respect for herself and also for me to ever electively expose herself in such an intimate way. Male doctors don't even have the same plumping that women do, so it would be like going to a mechanic who has never owned a car.  While my wife has other male doctors such as dentists, and eye doctors, she would never electively go to see a male gyn doctor.  Being a male, I just don't think you can ever take the "male" out of being a "male".

A lot of women say that the process is simply "clinical", which I find hard to believe.  Some women have been known to become aroused during these types of exams, and have also referred to their male ob/gyn's as being "cute", whereby making it improper.  Who cares if a male doctor see's 20 women a day, it still doesn't make it "right" or "proper".  I just wish that more women would follow their instincts.

This is not to say don't get any prenatal care, but to seek the right moral care, for both you and your spouse.  What good is having "good health", when your husband or SO starts to resent you, and starts to lose interest in the process, or wants a divorce because he feels that you didn't do "everything" possible on your part to protect the intimacy of the marriage or relationship.  In what better way could a woman show her man love and respect then to say "I go to women doctors for all of my intimate care and treatment"

"What is truly disgusting is that some women think that it is ok' to drop their pants in a drop of a hat for some stranger who decided to become a doctor for a living.  The OP is to be commended for attempting to protect the intimacy of her marriage.  It is simply improper for a woman in my opinion to electively seek out a male ob/gyn when it can be avoided.  No distance is too great to drive to protect one's modesty in my opinion!""

WHAT THE FUCK. There is just so much I want to say about this post from this 'man', but the outrage I feel EVERY time I read it causes me to think, and, of course, write incoherently. It's just ridiculous. And I'm not sure what the hell 'plumping' means, but apparently only other women have it, and I'm not sure if I should be upset about that or not. The responses to this post are mostly great. The person who wrote this must be so completely insecure in their marriage that they never let their wife out of their site. Oh, and if I were a man, I'd be personally insulted about what this 'man' insinuates about men in this post. Insane. I have a male OB/GYN. I've ALWAYS had male OB/GYNs, not by choice, but by chance. It's never really made a difference to me, I guess. I've never thought one was 'cute' as this guy says. I thought this most recent one I procured last Friday was adorable, in a sense that I wanted to pick him up and make him play with my other Barbies. Seriously, he's very small, and I feel like a giant next to him.  Oh, and Vesko doesn't love me any less because Dr. Barbie had to check my insides out. He (Vesko) still knows he's the king of them (my insides). In my opinion, that's clearly this guy's problem. GET A PENIS ENLARGEMENT! Anyway, I'm curious what you all think, guys & ladies. I just can't imagine anyone else feels the way this man feels. I can understand feeling more comfortable with a woman, but this thinking is completely irrational.


Crazy chiz, huh? Melissa posted that to me on Sunday, before her birthday at Chuy's. Gah, I LOVE Chuy's, and her birthday dinner was most excellent, except that for some stupid ass reason they pushed a round table & a square table together and sat 10 people around it. I ate at the awkward junction of the round & square table :(  A couple margaritas helped, though.  Oh, speaking of Melissa's birthday, I also found out that CRAZY Lil Wayne bitch share's a birthday with my Moogieboogieboo...whiiiiich is unfortunate...and I suppose will also make Crazy Lil Wayne bitch 45 upon his release from prison. 


Monday was hot, exhausting, & expensive. I had to run all over hell & high water picking up & dropping off prescriptions. I started taking a new prescription for my headaches which has several annoying side effects, one of the most prominent of which is making ANYTHING carbonated taste bitter & flat. It's terrible. It also leaves a bad taste in my mouth, like, in general, alllll the time.  It makes me sleepy constantly. It makes my already bad circulation seems worse. And I still have headaches from time to time. I'm trying to be positive, though. 


Tuesday was TEEN MOM FINALE! OMG! I'm so upset. :( I don't know what I'll do until it starts again. That was Vesko's & my night to watch TV & bitch like catty hos about other people, and then I'd call Melissa that night or the next day and gossip to her about what a skank Amber is.  But really. She is. I can't believe she's letting that convict stay with her AND change Leah. That poor baby is just being set up to be molested, and it's horrible. Gary MAY be a doofus sometimes, but he's grounded in truth & he means well, and THAT's what counts when it comes to that pudgy faced baby girl. In regard to Farrah, I think that guy, Julian (?) has had at LEAST a couple dicks in his face and at LEAST as many in his ass. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it, but own it, queen. Don't live in denial. But, you know, if that's what you need, a cover story, Farrah's your girl, coz she doesn't want to replace Derrick, and you don't want to replace that buttplug. Maci's situation has become unfortunate, because she's come SUCH a long way, but I did  think she was moving too fast and too far with Kyle. And Catelynn & Tyler OH EM GEE. PERFECT. Their visit was perfect. Their daughter is perfect. Their gifts were perfect. The last gift they gave made me cry. They're just so adorable. I want to give them both a firm pat on the back.


So, about this show you're not watching. I don't want to give you too many details, because I don't want you to have a preconceived notion of what it's about (because several people told me omg, this show is great, it's about this & this & this, & you HAVE to watch it!)...What they told me it's about it's kinda about, but sorta. Anyway, you HAVE TO WATCH DEXTER. IT IS AMAZING. I watched the first epi on a whim, because several people had raved about it, and I couldn't decide what movie to watch next from my netflix queue, but I was hooked from then on. I watched the whole first season (12 epis) in like 2 days (they're almost an hour a piece), which made me feel like a worthless fat ass, but when you're doped out on drugs, it makes the horrible side effects a little less noticeable if you've got a little bit of great entertainment.


The rest of the week was good, I'm sure, but I honestly cant remember it. Isn't that terrible? Hooooooray drugs!? No, actually, they suck. Well, I guess I remember Friday night. We booked it to the bank when Vesko got off work so we could add him to a bank account so he can be a grown up with his name on a debit card. Seriously, I'm not happy with Chase, but I stay with them, because it's easier than changing EVERYTHING over to another bank. So, then we went to my parents' house to borrow my dad's truck & we were going to eat there, but Mom gave us coopins for Logan's, so Vesko said he wanted to take me somewhere, & we went there. It was most excellent. I have to say, life doesn't get much better than a sweet tea, an iceberg salad with ranch, a 16oz. steak medium rare & bloody, & a sweet potato. Vesko had ribs & chicken with fries & sauteed mushrooms, and he was in hog heaven, too. I know I've said it, but no matter what, he always has somethin' to do or say to make my day better. 


Today has been CRAZY.


We got up & Vesko started out with his amazingness. I got a quickie massage before we got dressed and left to go load up his dirtbike to drive across the globe to drop it off & have it worked on. On the waaaaaay...on the corner of Lawrence & 518, the League City Animal Shelter had a mobile pet adoption centre set up and VESKO said, "Let's stop & look at the doggies." I said it was a bad idea, but if there wiener dog there, you know I'd HAVE to have it...and then we both laughed. Ha...ha...ha...

You're RIGHT! They had honeybees, and we got one of those! She's adorable, and her name is Maci Jo. We're pretty excited parentals here. :)

Anyway, the boring stuff was that then we loaded the bike, drove over off 249 & Jones & dropped it off & then had to drive back. Not so boring was visiting my parents again, then we got to go to Petsmart, where everyone loved Maci, & she got her hurh & nails did, and now we're here.

Unfortunately, Maci still smells like dogs & cats, so we're about to take another shower. I've been attempting to write this blog entry since Sunday of last week, & I have some other things to write about, but this entry is already so all over the place that I don't want to put it in here. I'm going to do my best to write it tomorrow. We were going to go to the zoo tomorrow, but my hips & knees are KILLING me, and I'm not sure how that's going to pan-out :(  Either way, there will be BBQ tomorrow, and perhaps some parental/child bonding time.

Come for the Shrimp Toast, but STAY for the Abuse...

I'll get to that in a moment. So, I had a pretty exciting Friday, some of which the other party with me found wholly humiliating.

Friday was a most excellent day. I got up at 10:40, got dressed, and headed out to pick up Melissa. Earlier in the week, we had decided to indulge our desire for shrimp toast, so we had planned to work a trip to Szechuan Garden in during our day of play. As luck would have it, Mel & I left her dad's house around 11:20, so we decided to make it a bit of an early lunch. For those of you unaware of what the miracle of shrimp toast is, aside from describing it as a most delightful party of flavour, I'd have to describe it as follows: a mound of flaked shrimp meat (possibly imitation, but delicious none the less) mixed with some kind of binding ingredient (possibly creme cheese), set atop a piece of toast, lightly battered, then fried to a golden brown. I'm not real sure how anything like that could ever be disliked by anyone, but I digress. The 'Chinese' food is average, at best, at Szechuan Garden, but Melissa and I could probably be convinced to shank someone if shrimp toast were the reward...other possible rewards include, but are not limited to: Josh Hartnett (only for Mel), most Vietnamese fare, a master's degree we didn't have to work for, or a sum of money (really, we'd probably do it for around $1000 bucks, but that's not a guarantee of death. At best it would be a maiming). And, again, I digress. Let me get to the meat and potatoes of this day. Mel & I walked into SG, and a small Asian man asked us if we wanted a booth or a table. I told Mel I wanted a booth, Mel relayed said message to tiny Asian man, and, at that point, his eyes became wide with a look of shock & horror. From there, he paraded us around the front of the restaurant looking for a booth that was at the end of the row. It occurred to me, at that point, what was about to happen. Small Asian Guy found a booth on the end, and then he proceeded to make a spectacle of using his Small Asian Guy body to forcibly move the end booth further away from the table. Melissa, by now, had become mortified; I had started laughing. I then proceeded to tell the man, "Excuse me, this is really unnecessary...Please stop. This is wholly uncalled for...STOP." When SAG had decided that he had moved the beeth far enough apart, he then tried to move the table, made some headway, but then failed. So, Mel & I sat down, at which point, the table was much too far away from me, so I instinctively pulled it back toward me. Then, the table was far too far away from Melissa, but she couldn't scoot the booth forward again, so she had to eat on the edge of her seat. I found this whole action completely unnecessary but hilarious; however, Melissa was completely mortified. Seriously, SAG really deserved to be tripped as he walked away, at the very least. Anyway, shrimp toast was procured, and no tip was left, so all was ok in my book... Admittedly, though, neither of us intend to ever patronize that place again.

From there, we went to the HobLob, because I really wanted to hit up the Christmas deco sale. Allow me to say, I didn't even make it to the Christmas aisles before we were forced to leave for our next appointment. But, not all was lost. I did manage to procure a few items (on clearance, of course) for the scrapbook I'm working on that, I'll be honest, will probably NEVER be finished. But seriously, if YOU like to scrapbook, let me know, coz I have a LOT of stuff.

Mel & I went on to our next appointment, which was a bonding experience, heh. Melissa sat in with me in the early afternoon with a PCOS specialist, who did a uterine ultrasound & exam, Turns out I should be able to have kids, so that excites me. Well, the fact that my ovaries aren't the size of raisins is what actually excites me. Unfortunately, in my stupidity, I didn't think to mention that I have a latex allergy, so my veejay will be paying for THAT for a while.

Anyway, after that hot mess of a show, Melissa & I picked up her boyfriend, and then we hauled ass to the incredibly ghetto mess that IS Mall of the Mainland, to Cinemark 12, to see Social Network. Here's what I have to say about THAT. First, the movie was exceedingly long. It has a run time of 2:01, I think, and, I'm sorry, but I love a good ol' fashioned 90 minute movie. Also, maybe I'm just stupid, but the movie started and ran for like 5 minutes before I realized it was the MOVIE, and not some HORRIBLE preview. But, none-the-less, the movie was mostly entertaining and kind of informative. I'd probably watch it again. I might even pay another $2.75 to see it, but that's the about it. I had thought of something else clever and witty to say here, but my oh-so-amazing list of drugs I take for pain & such have apparently hijacked another train of thought, so just pretend I said something witty & clever and chuckle a bit.

So, I have to go back to this beeth moving thing. I feel like there should be a movement created that governs the way that fat people are treated publickly (<-- screw you guys, I choose to use the -ck because just a -c would make it -lissly). I mean, sure, you can still judge us, and other fat people can judge fatter people still (like me. I'm not a self-hating fatty. I acknowledge the fact that I'm overweight, but I also acknowledge the fact that HOLY SHIT, HOW DO YOU EVEN FIT IN THE SHOWER!?...which immediately provokes the thought of that disgusting scent that extremely FAT people have. Dr. Brennan mentions it in an epi of Bones...yeah, you either get that reference or you don't). Anyway, I think, as a general rule, if you could fit 4 of us into a Ford Fiesta without a shoe-horn or a crowbar, you probably DON'T need to move the beeth apart. Also, if we can still wear items from Victoria's Secret (again, without the use of a shoe-horn or a crowbar), you probably DON'T need to pull the beeth apart (have you picked up on 'beeth' yet, people? I hope so, coz it's not a typo).

Speaking of Vicki's, does anyone know when the next semi-annual sale is? I'm in desperate need of some panties on the cheap. First person to let me know gets a firm handshake, a pat on the back, and maybe this $25 Visa giftcard I have, which was separated from the instructions on how to activate it, and now you can't, but I carry it around anyway, in hopes one day of activating it, or maybe pawning it off on someone else (which is how I got it. I do appreciate it, though. Thanks, Mom! No, I'm not being sarcastic. Mom gives me a lot of her random giftcards if she thinks she won't use them or she'll forget about them, so I wouldn't wanna screw up that gravytrain, right? RIGHT. Right now I'm waiting for the freezer to clear out so I can order some Omaha Steaks, and I'm waiting for SOMEONE to tell me when the next Vicki's sale is, so I can have an excuse to head that way AND go to Red Robin for about $25. Oh, and no, I'm not giving you either of those giftcards). Really, though, you could PROBABLY figure out how to activate it, and I think it might even be $50, so isn't the possibility of maybe getting a free $50 worth finding out when the next sale is? I think so. I would.

Moving right along, though. Let me tell you about today: It was rather uneventful, and, honestly, it was a wonderful day.

Vesko & I went to my parents' house, where Vesko put a new top frame & roof on my dad's golf cart. Vesko says he didn't do anything, really, but it really means a lot to me that he does things like that for my dad or for my family. Having been in a relationship where my husband was completely emotionally unattached & distanced not only from my family, but HIS, too, it's really a wonderful change to have someone who is so devoted to both his & mine. Vesko never complains or whines about anything he's asked to do, and rarely is he asked. He frequently volunteers before it can even be said, and I have to admit, it warms my heart.

Mom also picked up her new Expedition today (oh, you didn't know she'd bought one? Yeah, neither did I), and I have to say, it's not bad! I'm definitely excited that it's NOT white (it's silver). We were supposed to go to the UH foosball game tonight, too, but my stomach was not ideal, one of my signature headaches came about, and, for some reason, I was exhausted. I'm telling you, I wouldn't wish this on ANYone. It's terrible, really. Mom was very understanding, though, and I love her for that.  She has been there for me through all of my health BS this year to support me & just listen and be understanding, and, for that, she is a saint. I really wish that all of you could have the relationship with your mother that I have. Not only is it mutually beneficial, it's really just a LOT of fun.

Ooh, speaking of fun, Vesko got my Celica running, because we needed to move it out of storage at my parents' barn & here to our house. I had finally come to peace about selling it, but I'm telling you, every time I get in that car & let it go, it gets harder & harder to let go. It is just a TON of fun to drive. I'm really a reasonable person, & I like to plan for my future, which is why I bought a reasonable SUV (which I also LOVE), but, I have to say, if Vesko goes through with purchasing a 4 door vehicle like the supercharged (I think he said?) Buick he's been looking at, I think I'll have  to get the sports car next turn around. That's a while down the line, though. Like, at least 3 years, heh.

Anyway, it's late, & Vesko & I are hoping to make it to the zoo tomorrow before Moogie's birthday dinner at Chuy's, so I shall bid you goodnight & adieu. Until the next time..SOMEONE FIND THE SEMI-ANNUAL SALE! ;)

^^^^So, you guys probably get a double post today, because I wrote this late on Saturday night, and I evidently didn't click 'post', so here it is...Saturday's edition.^^^^

Am I the ONLY person who regularly runs out of bay leaves?

This is an otherwise un-noteworthy first post to what will (hopefully) be my regularly updated thought-to-text update of my view of the world (which is probably bleak & dim, at best).

Anyway, back to the title of my post. I find this incredibly annoying. I don't even cook that often, yet every few weeks, or maybe once a month or so, I find myself having to trek to the store just for a new container of bay leaves. I'm cooking now, though. Maybe I should post recipes on this blog. At least it would be a slightly more useful waste of your (and my) time, right? Either way...at the beginning of the summer, I decided I would bonsai a laurel bush (re: bay leaves). Through my incredibly close, personal friend who happens to know it all when it comes to gardening (re: that slightly homeless looking guy who works in the garden department at Home Depot and occasionally talks to me when I stare quizzically at something long enough), I found out that laurel bushes grow, well, prettttty bushy. For the record, I also decided I'd bonsai a gardenia, but that lasted for about 2.5wks until it started to get hotter outside, and then my bush turned brown. I also bought a lily and a hibiscus. The lily died in about the same amount of time; turns out flowers aren't mah thang. Speaking of time, I also picked up a wee pot of thyme & planted it. I'm not sure exactly what's wrong with it, but it's all long & viney, and the leaves are spaced far apart. So, I'm not real sure where all of this is going, but I think it's going to be boring...be prepared.

There are a few other things that have been on my mind lately...with all the media coverage lately about privacy on social networking sites, you would think people would be a little less stupid when it comes to them. But, I guess humankind can always be counted on the be RETARDED. Here's one of my favourites. I posted it via twitter a couple weeks ago, but this person has not let up yet, and is continuing to post things just as incredibly stupid:

Alright, fair enough, you're a fan. From far away, you don't look atrocious, and, as far as we know, you could just be some teenage/early 20's whore that can't see past the end of the next hour, and you're not considering that EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS, family members, pastors, potential employers, kids, and people like me are seeing that you're a pretty slutty ho-bag. Whatever.

Wow. REALLY? Just WOW. There is NO part of that bio that makes me think you're going to end up being a crazy cat lady, who will end up old & lonely, and your kids won't respect you coz you posted embarassing posts on facebook that, again, someone like ME rebroadcasted. Oh, and engaged? Why are you engaged? Clearly your engagement means nothing to you since you're willing to jump on the junk of an imprisoned rap thug who probably DOESN'T have the best history when it comes to his use of prophylactics. I'm also curious how many, as your favourite rapper would call them, 'baby daddies' you has. Just curioso. 

And, folks, here's the clincher. Tell me this isn't something you wouldn't want to toss your hotdog in, eh?:

Sexy sexy! If I had a penis, I can tell you EXACTLY where it would go...well, maybe. It'd probably go right in that twiggy looking ho, Keira Knightly. Did I even spell that right? I don't care.

In addition to the afore mentioned skankatron, the other thing that seriously freaks me out about facebook specifically is how some people seem to act like it's a dating site. I donno about you, but I feel like facebook is more of a 'keep in touch with friends' site, and myspace is the site where you can guiltlessly pull some tail. Also, seriously, why would you write some of these things about yourself? They're not even flattering. Here's one for you:

HEYYYY CHUNKY BUTT! Before you attack me, as a fat person, I feel that I'm allowed to make fat comments.  Oh, also, have you ever heard of punctuation, please & thank you?

Well, I had every intention of rambling on for a bit longer, but Vesko just walked in, and he has no ability to hold his tongue when it's clear that you're on the phone or doing something else that takes concentration. So, for now, I bid you adieu. Here's to what I hope is a long life of posting and hopefully making a couple people laugh from time to time.